That kind of joy does not demand constant brightness. It does not ask anyone to audition for sweetness. It just says, here we are, still alive, still listening. Even tears can fill the inner vessel with joy, if we let them be part of the water.
You are an incredible writer, so articulate. I look forward to seeing your name in my inbox. My favourite part of this post was:
"People sometimes imagine that when I dance outside in subzero temperatures, I am pretending nothing hurts. It is the opposite. The cold teaches me to pay attention.[....] I do not dance to escape what is real. I dance to meet it."
I am definitely one of those people who imagined that the cold didn't bother you. :)
In order to find an unconditional joy, I have to separate it from any emotion or any feeling of comfort or serenity I might experience. When I pull it all apart, the only true joy is that of gratitude of being alive to experience the variety of things we can experience here, whether good, bad, boring, overwhelming, time passing, the variety of colors and the ability to perceive them, as well as those things that we typically associate with happiness or joy, but also those which make us sad or mad or sink into despair. How can we have joy when we're in despair? I have known despair, and I can only say, it can come if you have a spiritual belief that sees the condition of despair as something unrelated to your worth. I don't know, maybe I should go write poetry. But for something as profound as joy to exist, it would have to be unconditional and not tied to any state of happiness, comfort, connection, etc. Just the ability to be, in all forms and conditions.
Sometimes I don’t know what joy is or if I’m really feeling it. In those moments I look around me and take in the beauty of my surroundings, the birds that sing and go about their lives without hesitation or guilt. The trees, the fresh air and the little things that make me happy my dog’s innocence and its love for me warm my heart and sometimes reminds me of my own innocence that still is part of me hidden in the small child that use to be. Then I realize that joy is always with me just as the day greets the sun.
You are an incredible writer, so articulate. I look forward to seeing your name in my inbox. My favourite part of this post was:
"People sometimes imagine that when I dance outside in subzero temperatures, I am pretending nothing hurts. It is the opposite. The cold teaches me to pay attention.[....] I do not dance to escape what is real. I dance to meet it."
I am definitely one of those people who imagined that the cold didn't bother you. :)
In order to find an unconditional joy, I have to separate it from any emotion or any feeling of comfort or serenity I might experience. When I pull it all apart, the only true joy is that of gratitude of being alive to experience the variety of things we can experience here, whether good, bad, boring, overwhelming, time passing, the variety of colors and the ability to perceive them, as well as those things that we typically associate with happiness or joy, but also those which make us sad or mad or sink into despair. How can we have joy when we're in despair? I have known despair, and I can only say, it can come if you have a spiritual belief that sees the condition of despair as something unrelated to your worth. I don't know, maybe I should go write poetry. But for something as profound as joy to exist, it would have to be unconditional and not tied to any state of happiness, comfort, connection, etc. Just the ability to be, in all forms and conditions.
Sometimes I don’t know what joy is or if I’m really feeling it. In those moments I look around me and take in the beauty of my surroundings, the birds that sing and go about their lives without hesitation or guilt. The trees, the fresh air and the little things that make me happy my dog’s innocence and its love for me warm my heart and sometimes reminds me of my own innocence that still is part of me hidden in the small child that use to be. Then I realize that joy is always with me just as the day greets the sun.
Beautiful, Gurdeep!
Sat sri akal ji!
Thank you for this thoughtful pause in my morning!!!