Have you ever paused to reflect on the profound shift in what brings us joy as we journey through life? As children, our hearts were easily filled with wonder and excitement over the simplest of achievements and experiences. The monumental milestones of learning to walk, taking that first exhilarating jump, or conquering the stairs for the first time were not just accomplishments, but moments of pure, unadulterated joy. Even the most mundane activities, like strolling down a street, became adventures filled with discovery. The sight of a fallen leaf or a uniquely shaped pebble could spark our curiosity and fill us with an inexplicable sense of delight.
As we transitioned into our teenage years, our perspective on joy underwent a subtle yet significant transformation. The simple pleasures that once captivated us—like spontaneous jumps, leisurely walks, splashing in puddles, or collecting leaves—no longer held the same allure. Instead, our sources of happiness evolved to encompass more substantial achievements. The thrill of victory in a school race, the sense of accomplishment from mastering a challenging subject, or the warm glow of receiving praise from a respected teacher became our new wellsprings of joy. While these experiences were still relatively modest in the grand scheme of life, they represented a notable shift from the simple pleasures of childhood, marking our growth and changing perceptions.
The journey into full adulthood brought with it yet another shift in our pursuit of joy and excitement. Our focus broadened to encompass significant life events and major milestones. When we achieved these substantial goals, they indeed brought us immense happiness and satisfaction. However, as we continued to age and evolve, we found ourselves in a perpetual cycle of seeking ever-greater accomplishments. The triumphs of yesterday, once sources of immense pride and joy, began to lose their luster. We found ourselves constantly raising the bar, chasing increasingly ambitious goals to recapture that elusive feeling of joy, often dismissing or downplaying our past successes in the process.
This evolution begs a crucial question: Why does this transformation occur? What is it about reaching our 40s or 50s or 60s that makes it so challenging to derive happiness from life's simpler pleasures? Why can't the act of jumping or the discovery of a beautifully shaped leaf bring us the same joy it once did? Instead, we find ourselves fixated on grand, often materialistic achievements—the acquisition of a sprawling house, the purchase of a luxury vehicle, or the attainment of a prestigious, high-paying position. We convince ourselves that these substantial accomplishments are the key to unlocking true happiness and fulfillment.
This shift in perspective is at the root of why many individuals in today's world struggle to find genuine joy. Even those who have achieved a commendable level of success—perhaps not reaching every goal they set for themselves, but nonetheless living what most would consider a good life—often find themselves grappling with a persistent sense of dissatisfaction. The reason behind this paradox is clear: we've inadvertently set impossibly high standards for what we believe should bring us joy. We've lost the ability to appreciate and find happiness in life's smaller moments and simpler pleasures. This disconnect between our expectations and reality creates a problematic cycle of perpetual dissatisfaction.
When you encounter someone who has lived a fulfilling life, achieving many if not all of their goals, yet still struggles to find joy in their accomplishments, it becomes evident that a shift in perspective is necessary. The truth is, we don't need monumental events or grand gestures to experience true joy in our lives. The key to rediscovering happiness lies in reconnecting with our inner child—that part of us that could find wonder and excitement in the simplest of things. It's about relearning to appreciate the small, everyday moments that we've grown accustomed to overlooking.
Rather than waiting for life-altering events to feel truly joyful, we should strive to find happiness in the beauty that surrounds us daily. Take a moment to bask in the warmth of sunshine or marvel at the way light filters through the leaves of a tree. Pause to admire the vibrant colours of flowers or the intricate patterns in nature. Allow yourself to be filled with wonder at the sight of a majestic tree, contemplating its years of growth and the stories it could tell. Rediscover the simple pleasures that once brought you so much joy—the excitement of finding an unusually shaped leaf on the sidewalk, the refreshing sensation of dipping your hand in a cool lake or river, the satisfaction of preparing a delicious breakfast, or the peacefulness of a leisurely walk.
Living in a simple cabin in the Yukon wilderness brought me profound joy. I lived without running water, relying on an outhouse. The modest shelter, daily chores, and absence of much technology fostered a sense of presence and appreciation for life's essentials. This minimalist lifestyle taught me that true happiness stems from within, not from external comforts. Challenges became satisfying, and each task meaningful. I found contentment in harmony with my surroundings, experiencing a deep-rooted, enduring happiness. The Yukon experience showed me that joy lies in simplicity—in quiet reflection, starry skies, and rustling leaves. It reinforced that stripping away the unnecessary often reveals the most profound and lasting joy.
Talking about my cabin reminds me of my days dancing around it. Here's a video that I'm sure you'll enjoy watching and experience some joy from:
As you begin to embrace these moments of simple joy, you may come to a profound realization: the feelings of sadness or loneliness you've been experiencing aren't an inherent part of your being. Rather, they're the result of unrealistic expectations and desires that have gradually eroded your capacity for joy. It's crucial to remember that as human beings, we possess an innate ability to find happiness and fulfillment without the need for grand achievements or material possessions. Life is precious and fleeting—far too short to spend chasing an elusive idea of joy. Instead, we should strive to find happiness in every day, in every moment, embracing the full spectrum of experiences that life has to offer. By shifting our focus to appreciate the beauty in simplicity, we can rediscover the abundant joy that has always been present in our lives, waiting for us to recognize and embrace it once again.
(If you can, write your thoughts in the comments below)
Joy Was Around You, but You Ignored It